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Love Is What Matters Most
Meditations on the Heart's Truth
Thomas H. Beyer
A book coming soon from Outskirts Press
Excerpts . . . The subject of love captivates us for all kinds of reasons, in all kinds of ways; and many words have been used throughout human history to talk about it. It's clear to me, that we're most interested in love because we know, deep down, that love gives our lives the greatest meaning and happiness. We are most fulfilled, most at peace, when we live as love; being attentive and caring toward our loved ones and those we cherish—our family, and friends, and anyone else we choose. Love leads us, as well, to those situations, activities, and creative pursuits that move us, lift us up, and give us a real sense of being connected to someone or something. Love simply nurtures and nourishes us like nothing else can; and one could even say that love is what life is really all about . . . After all, isn't a truly satisfying life one filled with heart-warmth and joy, passion and generosity, kindness and compassion? And it's true, that we humans have the capacity (and for some people, even the propensity) to value other things more than love. What we end up with then, are lives far less fulfilling than they could be. Likewise, our world is far less peaceful than it could be when love is not held in the highest regard; and isn't this painfully evident as we look in and around us these days. How good it is when we truly realize that love touches us most deeply, and actually aligns us with who we are at our innermost and from where love flows! Love reflects what's in our heart of hearts, and our connection with the very Source of all creation and the life-giving energy that sustains us. Love gives us the primary way of experiencing and duplicating this deepest-reaching bond, and the greatest of all intimacies, and our purest joy and peace . . . And don't we naturally revere those people who love the most, give the most of themselves, and help us all do the same? My writings, then, are a result of decades of reflection, and listening to and learning from many people. I am profoundly indebted to all those who've helped guide and inspire me. So, as I have been influenced by a wide variety of people, my words aim to return this favor in kind, and speak to the most common ear, in this world where discord and divisiveness and people struggling are ever so apparent. "Love Is What Matters Most" is an open-at-any-page-at-any-time book, and a rallying cry to bring more and more love into our world. Each of the written pieces taken individually, and the work as a whole, is meant to draw the reader into the very essence of love and the very essence of who we are. And, it's clear to me, that discovering the true nature of love—and putting the highest premium on it—is to find our own true nature, our true home, and where life's greatest meaning, happiness, peace, and salvation abide. This basic message is stated, repeated, and elaborated upon in various ways throughout the book. And repetition is good, in helping us understand anything more clearly and deeply . . . There is value, then, in slowly reading and re-reading what's presented here, and letting it sink in, in any instant and over time—all for the sake of realizing our deepest love, and bringing this to any and all aspects of our lives. **** Chapter 1 The Greatest of All Intimacies
When we're completely honest with ourselves, we can be certain of this: Love is most important, most fulfilling and nourishing, because it stays truest to our innermost being. And when this truth-telling light of recognition and affirmation goes on in us, what else is there to do, really?--but give ourselves wholeheartedly to love in any and all ways. Or said this way: It's the love we give—no matter what or where—that matters most and does us the most good! **** It's so good to look all the way inside ourselves, where everyone is being given life in each moment via the heart. And here, within each pulse, is an intimacy with the Source of life that's as deep and wide as all creation. In calling this core open-heartedness “love,” we're pointing to our Source-connected/God-connected essence and common bond, and the paramount expression of that. And clearly, love is the most prized feeling-sense of closeness and connection we humans can have for one another. And connectedness is the very nature of the universe—of the all-pervading Energy, or Spirit, that's creating, and sustaining, and linking all beings and things. This leads some people to proclaim and rejoice that, “God is love.” **** Our most fundamental relationship is with our Source—with What is pulsing life in our every molecule and cell, heartbeat and breath, and bit of consciousness shining through our eyes, and ears, and skin. This union with our Creator is our core-truth, and is experienced and held most dear in and as the open heart. Such is the love that mirrors this greatest of all intimacies, and our inherent goodness, and purest sense of happiness and inner peace. Such is our heart's truth. And how deeply satisfying it is to convey this, as a tender and passionate affection for life in any and all forms! **** It makes perfect sense, then, that the love that's filled with attentiveness and caring, heart-warmth and sharing, is the firmest foundation on which any marriage, family, community and country could ever rest. The healthiest partnership, the best parenting, being a true friend, or a great nation are all predicated on love, fueled by love, and serve to bring more of it out of us, more and more of the time. **** Open-hearted, pure-hearted, kind-hearted, warm-hearted, tender-hearted, good-hearted, big-hearted, and the like: Beautiful terms melting into one and the same meaning; beautiful terms melting into one and the same Source. And, in looking to our core-truth--to our common Origin and mutually shared essence—we find our true nature and our deepest love. Or said this way: Open-heartedness is what our true nature is made of, and what our true nature naturally exudes. **** As love's roots and primary nature go deeper and beyond any definition, still, we can allude to love, and experience it, embody it, in ways with which we're familiar. This can be as universal as to embrace God's presence in all that is; or specifically expressed in “brotherly” and charitable ways; romantic, warm, and sensual ways; kind, compassionate, and supportive ways; welcoming, accepting, and forgiving ways. **** However it's spoken about or conveyed, love naturally finds ways to give of itself—through any gesture, small or large, and any form of assistance, guidance, or extension of a helping hand. And how great, that there are so many ways and circumstances for love to be felt and given! **** However love is genuinely shown toward our spouse, or our children, our siblings, parents, friends, or even total strangers--the open heart is behind it all. And wherever our sentiments and affections rest, ultimately, the main attraction is open-heartedness itself. Such is being in love with love itself, and the giving and receiving of it, purely and simply. This is staying true to our core-connection with our Source, with God; and this best serves the particular directions our lives take. And, if we can't help yielding to love's preeminence in our lives, we are truly fortunate and truly blessed. **** Love is, indeed, about blessing--in our receiving God's gift of open-heartedness, and our reciprocating this Grace, replicating it, through all the open heart gives. This provides our lives with the greatest meaning, greatest purpose, and is being “lucky” in the truest sense of the word! **** Chapter 2 Such a Simple, Powerful Reminder
In any moment, we may feel a lot of love; sometimes, not so much. What's key is the importance we place on love, and our intention to live it, right now, as best we can . . . And feeling a lack of love can be just what we need to fuel our hunger to find it, give it, appreciate and value it. **** In any moment, we can recognize any of our unloving thoughts, or feelings or actions, and let these drop into the heart; and be melted and converted into the loving-kindness that's ever-available there . . . The recognition itself contains a natural opening and softening, a natural letting be and letting go. This is our being just like the open heart is. **** How perfect, that we can be interrupted by such a simple, powerful reminder: “Oh yeah, love!” And what a great way to live: discovering any and all ways to conceive of love, sense love, treasure love, and share love—even the littlest bit of it . . . In an instant, we can open to and from the open heart that's always been here at our innermost, at our core--waiting for us to be touched by it, and waiting for us to surrender to it. **** Sometimes, our tenderness and kindness, attentiveness and caring, passion and generosity may appear small and superficial; and sometimes, large and profound. It doesn't matter. We can find and give whatever love we can (in whatever amounts), no matter what else might be going on in and around us. **** At any time, we may be thinking specifically about love, or we may be thinking about something else altogether, like practical matters or the situation at hand. Still, the warm and giving heart can remain our underlying and undying devotion—influencing us, inspiring us, and leading us. Regardless of what we're feeling or experiencing, love is what we can trust, be committed to and choose. It's what we know in our heart of hearts is most valuable, and what we can dedicate our lives to. **** All sorts of thoughts and feelings can fly around inside us like leaves in the wind. Still, amid all this turbulence, a mere “sliver” of love can remain our guiding light, our beacon, our focus--whether we're as motionless as the eye of a hurricane, or exhilarated by the storm's force, or tossed and tattered by whatever it kicks up. This is the open-heartedness at our core that we can always look to and reflect; the unconditional love, and peace, and goodness underneath it all. **** Chapter 3 The Heart's Truth
Here is a testimonial, or report, one might hear or give: “In reflecting on my Source--on What creates and sustains, transforms and contains it all--there is a natural opening in me. One can call this opening ‘love,' or ‘trust,' or ‘faith,' or ‘being settled at home.' Whatever I name it, it is a most intuitive and grateful response when my deepest-reaching bond with the Origin of all life is clearly recognized—when my heart's truth is most thoroughly told.” **** How wonderful to tell our heart's truth--our being ever-connected to and at home in God, in love. How wonderful to open to this--to think it, feel it, breathe it, meditate on it, and surrender to it; affirm, trust, and settle in it. How wonderful to base our living on all this, so purely and simply open-hearted, and at rest/at ease in being here, now and eternally home . . . So, how vital it is to pay attention to and let go of anything that would have us believe and act otherwise. **** How we think, and feel, and act may appear much different than who we are at our innermost. Our attitudes and desires, habits and behavior can seem completely contrary to our heart's truth--to our true nature, and this core open-heartedness and innate goodness. How essential, then, to be aware of any resistance or refusal to love, and to soften these “walls” we might build around our hearts. How good to continuously let our heart's truth--love itself--win out! **** For many of us, without continually reaffirming our intention to love, we're more likely to lapse into any of our loveless tendencies--any of the ways we might be catty and mean-spirited, smug and petty, possessive and controlling; or any of the ways we might unfairly judge or condemn others, spread rumors about them, or talk behind their back; or any of the ways we might be harboring any prejudice or ill-will toward another, or holding onto any kind of a grudge. Thankfully, in being sensitive to any of these tendencies, and the suffering they often cause, we can be stopped in our tracks. Thankfully, in recognizing any of our unloving, self-righteous ways, we can release them, and be steered back on love's course--with all the compassion and forgiveness gracefully afforded us . . . And even if, in any moment, we think we're incapable of love, the crying out for it helps open us to the open heart. **** Another testimonial, or report, one could hear or give: “If, in any moment, it appears that love doesn't matter the most in my life, and that I'm valuing something else more (or selling out in some way)—well then, it's good to have a soul-searching, heart-to-heart talk with myself. “And along related lines, it's obvious that ‘love' isn't genuine at all if it comes with ‘strings attached;' like, ‘I'll only love you if you behave in a certain way, do certain things, or conform to my expectations of how you should be.' . . . It's clear to me, that real love isn't dependent on ideal circumstances, or on others pleasing us in a certain way. The most genuine love is unconditional love.” **** In truly recognizing what's in our heart of hearts, and who we are, deep down, we can live more and more in sync with that—by bringing real attentiveness and caring, compassion and forgiveness, kindness and generosity to any aspect of our lives . . . Thus, we can unconditionally accept ourselves as we are (with all our faults and frailties), and admit, without reservation, the longing to drop any of our unloving, unforgiving, unfulfilling ways. **** Some of love's other bottom line qualities: Love loves to give its undivided attention to what is right in front of us--to stop and listen—with open ears, an open mind, and an open heart. Love gives us all the space to feel and be however we are. Love sincerely wants what's best for people, and for all of us to grow in our capacity and willingness to love. Love naturally treats another with kindness and respect, is considerate of another's feelings, and empathetic toward another's situation . . . And love simply looks to reach out, help out, and watch after another; serve and safeguard the overall health and well-being of another. Love is most emphatic and encouraging in pointing us to our own inherent goodness, dignity, and self-worth. Love's heart naturally “goes out” to another, and comforts and consoles in deeper ways than just being nice, and polite, and sympathetic. And being nice, and polite, and sympathetic are most wonderful. Love is patient, and forgives us when we're and impatient. Love is tolerant, and forgives us when we're intolerant. Love is forgiveness, and vice versa. The commitment to love digs deep into the heart, and looks to love even if we may not particularly feel like it. We can value love, value our heart's truth that much! **** No matter what's gone on in the past, or we think will happen in the future, we can simply be open-hearted, kind-hearted, good-hearted, big-hearted in whatever ways we can, right now. Such is truly, “keeping our eye on the prize”—knowing that love satisfies and nourishes us like else can. Such is keeping our primary intention and attention on love itself, in this or any moment! ****
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